EDIT: Pictures added courtesy of the L-word.
This weekend, may I say, was off the swizzle sticks… Flew down to San Frandisco, hung out with old and new friends and kicked it like dirty social hipsters. BTW BTDubz (Copyright: Baby Wombat): Delirium is the best club on the planet. They also happen to have the greatest beer on tap. Not many of you know of it, I’m sure, but its called PBR.
After a crazy night of tight pant-wearing and binge drinking, we decided to change it up a bit and put on our tight shorts and drank beyond our capacities at Coachella the next day. If you don’t know what that is, #1 you suck; #2 look it up and go to it next year. Words cannot express the joy and pain we experienced so I promise to add pics later.
Any hoosits - whilst at said venue (and for parts of the whole Cali trip) I came upon 12 realizations that I will forever hold dearly to heart:
- Saying “I’m surprisingly clean” after spending 12 hours in the blistering 100 degree weather around hipsters and dirt is 100% false.
- If you look at MIA the wrong way, she will try to harpoon your eye with a horn blower. (See John’s face for detail/proof)
- The Kills is one of the greatest bands ever.
- No matter how shitty of a mood you’re in, listen to Talking Heads’ “Naive Melody/This is the place” and I guarantee you everything will feel better.
- The bad guy from Collateral Damage is brothers with Vladcheck and doesn’t give a damn about his 08 beamer.
- Mayor Nickels is right, we do need to conserve water and shower with a buddy.
- a birimbao paired with an arrow, turns into a dangerous projectile. (Only if Smashley is in a groove)
- Coachella enables/endorses prepubescent coupling and drug smoking. NOTE TO SELF: Don’t let kids go to aforementioned event.
- There’s just some people you know that will always have your back.
- Hipster chicks are tough! If you dance-punch them in the face, they just keep body rolling.
- Arm meat – only some women (just 1, actually) can pull it off. Please refer to picture of mystery woman in tight-ass jean shorts impersonating a Thai-gar cat.
